Sunday, January 8, 2012

Looking For a Job? Try Politics

To all you bright young things out there, ever thought of a career in politics?

Just join one of Australia's two approved parties and, as you climb to the top of the party tree, you'll start to look so trim, taught and terrific the ABC'll be after you for a regular spot on Q&A!

But more than that, you'll acquire the kind of mental stamina that the rest of us can only dream about.

Take Minister for Whatever Tanya Plibersek, for instance. She was as raw and uncouth as any to begin with, a real wild child. Why, even as late as 2002, firmly ensconced in federal parliament, Tanya thought nothing of shooting her mouth off something terrible:

"I can think of a rogue state, which consistently ignores UN resolutions, whose ruler is a war criminal responsible for the massacres of civilians in refugee camps outside its borders. The US supports and funds this country. This year it gave it a blank cheque to continue its repression of its enemies. It uses US military hardware to bulldoze homes and kill civilians. It is called Israel and the war criminal is Ariel Sharon."

Forsooth she must blush at the very thought of it today!

But all that's in the past. The rough diamond of 2002 has been ground down to the photogenic perfection we see before us today. Now she's cool, calm, and collected, having finally acquired a most remarkable mental discipline and such a capacity for whispering sweet nothings you'd scarcely recognise in the Tanya of today the superbrat of yore:

"Dear ***,*

"Thankyou for your recent correspondence regarding Palestinian statehood. Australia strongly supports a negotiated two-state solution that allows a secure Israel to live side-by-side with a secure and independent future Palestinian state.

"The Minister for Foreign Affairs, the Hon Kevin Rudd MP, underlined to both sides Australia's strong support for a negotiated two-state solution during his visits to Israel and the Palestinian Territories in December 2010 and March and April 2011, and urged parties to return to negotiations.

"I have raised this issue with the Foreign Minister who assures me that Australia's decision to vote against the Palestinian resolution reflected Australia's strong concern that consideration of Palestinian membership in UNESCO was premature. The matter of Palestinian membership of the United Nations (UN) had only recently been placed before the UN Security Council (UNSC).

"Australia believed we should allow the process of UNSC consideration of Palestinian membership of the UN to run its course, rather than pre-empt it by seeking to address this question in different UN forums. The Foreign Minister assures me that if a Palestinian resolution is introduced to the UN General Assembly the Australian Government will consider it carefully before deciding how to vote.

"The Australian Government strongly supports the aspirations of the Palestinian people for their own state and is providing practical support for Palestinian institution-building in support of a future state"... yadda, yadda, yadda.

So come on boys and girls, whether it's Lab or Lib, why not consider a career in politics today? Oh, and our pollies have just had a wage rise! Tanya, who was getting $243,000 per annum is now getting $319,125 per annum! So there you go...

[* For the letter to which Tanya responded, and for that vital yadda, yadda, yadda, see This is how Australia handles Palestine: contempt with a smile, 6/1/12, antonyloewenstein.com.]

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Spot on.
I was planning on helping the Greens to unseat Tanya (just have to get ahead of Libs in the primaries), but now they have been frightened off as well.
No doubt she doesn't have bad dreams about Palestinians dying, while sleeping between her silk sheets ....

MERC said...

So why isn't beautiful Israel taking in Syrian refugees then?

Anonymous said...

Anon January 9th, you've missed the point.

The Australian Government and media is taking an appropriately critical position in condemning Government behaviour in Syria.

If the Syrian lobby was funding the major parties so that they were terrified of opposing Syrian Government violence, or if the Syrian lobby was taking MPS and journalists on 'fact-finding' junkets to Syria, or if the Australian Government starts holding birthday celebrations for Syria in our parliament, I promise I will start a web site dedicated to providing information about the brutality of the regime.

The Israel lobby's distortion of out political process (including the 4th Estate) is the reason why we need MERC's web site.

Stop killing Palestinians and stealing their land, and the criticism will cease. Stop buying the support of the Australian polity, and web sites like this will cease to exist.

MERC said...

Point well taken, but a tad too sophisticated for our Zionist friend I fear.

Anonymous said...

I don't know why you bother to bite, MERC. The drivel he spouts speaks for itself. That said, the Syrian situation is so murky and our press so compliant about broadcasting anything that benefits Israel, I wouldn't be surprised if the whole 'uprising' is a NATO black operation prior to - and to justify - yet another military attack to prevent bloodshed by bombing from a great height.

MERC said...

But seriously, wouldn't you like to hear him explain why suffering Syrians - 30 per day or so he claims - can't possibly be taken in by Israel, that otherwise heart of a heartless neighborhood?

Anonymous said...

Not really. I barely scan his other tripe.

Anonymous said...

What a bunch of hypocritical do nothings and conspiracy mongers.

Take a look at yourselves in the mirror.

As for your ideas MERC.
Israel took in over 800000 Arabic and African Jews that were thrown out of their own countries--including Syria.

My point is where are all the do good bleeding heart arab sunni muslim nations and their sychophantic ngos ?

But hey MERC you are right--what do i know--way too sophisticated for me.

Seriously, Syria will implode--its only a matter of when

Iran will lose her ally, as will hezbollah.

Iran will feel more bellicose and threaten strait of hormuz..

and from there with less that a year before iran's first nuke..

i would not want to be a palestinian, israeli, jordania, nor lebanese.

its all bad.

and the rights of palestinian people to a side for a moment--we have a homicidal, and insane religious leadership determined to use their weapon--in wiping israel off the map--as they had quoted.
except the fallout and bomb blast will kill everyone in a land one third the size of tasmania.

then palestinian land rights and israeli security will mean sweet nothing

MERC said...

Could you please source that one about "wiping Israel off the map" for me, or is it just another product of 'your' fertile imagination?

MERC said...

And, I almost forgot, you still haven't told me whether Israel - the world's greatest haven for refugees, right? - is going to open its borders to the suffering masses of Syria.

MERC said...

I don't accept the premise that Arab Jews were thrown out. Having first emptied 78% of Palestine of its non-Jewish Arab population in 1948, Israel then set out to boost its numbers by uprooting Arab Jewish communities in the early 50s.

MERC said...

"What is your position with regard to Zionism?

"I grew up in a Zionist home. We came here because of Zionism and were in the Zionist underground in Iraq."

From 'The Origins & Development of Israel's Black Panther Movement - an interview with BP leader Kokhavi Shemesh in 'Israel & the Palestinians', Edited by Davis, Mack & Yuval Davis, 1975, p 269