Saturday, May 22, 2010

The Japanese? Jewish!

Wow! This is amazing, Dad. The most amazing painting in the world. It's inspirational, isn't it?

-Inspirational? Of course it's inspiring. Because it's Indian!

No, Dad, not the Mona Lisa. She was an Italian noblewoman from the 16th century.

- Son, this is Mina Losa, a Gujerati washerwoman from Bhavnagar.


-Yes! Look at the expression on her face. What is she thinking?

She's contemplating the irony of her situation... asking us whether we are observers... or voyeurs.

-Rubbish! She's asking how much does this painter charge because my brother can get cheap paint.

Why would Leonardo da Vinci go all the way to Bhavnagar to paint someone?

-Because it's quite near where he lived.



Leonardo da Vinci's not Indian, Dad.

-Of course he is, son. Now look at this one.

What, The Last Supper?

-Ah! 12 men sitting around the table for dinner. Where are the women?... They're in the kitchen!

He's a Renaissance artist! Renaissance artists are famous for being Italian...Donatello... Raphael... Titian...

-Kashmiri, Punjabi, Gujerati. See, son, all the great artists - Indian!

(Da Vinci was an Indian, Goodness Gracious Me, BBC, 1998-2001)

I wouldn't miss The Australian Jewish News for quids. And here's why:

"Following Israeli Foreign Minister Avigdor Lieberman's trip to Japan last week, Zeddy Lawrence looks into claims that the relationship between the Jews and the Japanese isn't just diplomatic. Could it be that the legendary Samurai are actually descended from the ancient Israelites?... [T]here is a school of thought that contends that the ancient Japanese warriors were... Jewish. Indeed, the word samurai itself, it's argued, provides the first clue to the historical link between the oriental sect and the children of Israel. Samurai, it is claimed, is derived from the region where the tribe initially hailed from, namely Samaria." (The first samurai? 21/5/10)

Goodness gracious me.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"Could it be that the legendary Samurai are actually descended from the ancient Israelites?"

Was this from the comedy section of that august rag? It's just too hilarious.

Note the attempted appropriation of all things militaristic though in an attempt to expunge the internalised racist Euro image of "The Jew" as weak, sickly and physically enfeebled.