Secord of Armenia

In my post before last, Useful Fools (With Foreign Passports), you'll recall useful Anglo-Israeli fool Matthew finding that his Mossad-returned British passport had magically acquired, among others, a stamp from Azerbaijan, a former Soviet satellite which borders the Caspian Sea to the east and Iran to the south.

Why Azerbaijan? In a word, Iran:

"'This is ground zero for intelligence work', [says Shimon, one of dozens of Israeli Mossad agents who work in Azerbaijan at any given time]. 'Our presence here is quiet, but substantial. We have increased our presence in the past year, and it gets us very close to Iran. This is a wonderfully porous country'." (Where spy wars are waged on Iran, Sheera Frenkel, The Australian, 14/2/12]

A fact the Iranians are understandably not too happy about:

"Azerbaijan has angrily denied an Iranian claim that it has been helping Israeli spies plotting against Iran. Iran says agents of the Israeli secret service Mossad were behind the recent killings of Iranian nuclear scientists. The latest victim was Mostafa Ahmadi-Roshan, killed by a car bomb in north Tehran on 11 January. Azerbaijan's foreign ministry called Iran's claim 'slander'." (Azerbaijan in row with Iran over 'Israeli spies', bbc.co.uk, 13/2/12)

Which dispute means that Iran has been "'support[ing] and grow[ing] ties with Armenia, with which Azerbaijan has a territorial dispute', said Mehman Aliyev, director of the independent news agency Turan." (Where spy wars...)

Hmm... tell me more:

"An Iranian delegation led by President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is making an official visit to the Armenian capital Yerevan to increase bilateral ties. Ahmadinejad is making the visit upon the formal invitation of Armenian President Serzh Sargsyan... Iranian and Armenian officials signed 5 memorandum of understanding governing a variety of fields of cooperation, including the construction of hydroelectric turbines for the Aras dam, cooperation between the Institute for Standards and Industrial Research of Iran and the Armenian National Institute for Standards as well as cooperation in the fields of social welfare, employment and environment protection. Other major topics of discussion include Iranian oil exports to Armenia and the construction of railways, which builds upon a July 2007 MOU starting feasibility studies on the possibility of constructing an Armenian-Iranian railway." (Armenia, Iran to deepen cooperation, UPI, 23/12/11)

OK, got that? Iran's in Armenia because Israel's in Azerbaijan.

But, hey, what's this? NSW Labor MLC and deputy chair of the NSW Parliamentary Friends of Israel, Walt Secord, "has incurred the wrath of Azerbaijan for visiting one of its disputed territories and siding with the sovereignty claims of the seperatist Armenians... A supporter of various separatist causes, Mr Secord visited the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh last [December] as part of a self-funded trip that also took him to Israel, the Palestinian territories and Kurdish Iraq... 'While official recognition of the mountainous Karabakh Republic is a matter for the federal Australian government', Mr Secord said, 'I feel I have a duty as the co-deputy chair of the NSW Parliamentary Friends of Armenia to see Armenia and the mountainous Karabakh Republic first-hand'." (MP's separatist sympathy prompts ire in Azerbaijan, Phillip Coorey, Sydney Morning Herald, 30/1/11)

Right. What does Secord think he's doing dissing Mossad's top tourist destination, the wonderfully porous Azerbaijan? What could possibly have possessed him to take his eye off the main game and go troppo in the wilds of Nagorno-Karabakh?

Buggered if I know, but guess what happened to me only the other day.

I was sauntering down Macquarie St in the immediate vicinity of State Parliament when I happened upon a truly mountainous figure, a sort of Nagorno-Karabakh X 2, whom I instantly recognised as Walt Secord. No kidding! He was in heated conversation with a more molehill-sized individual, whom I also recognised instantly as Vic Alhadeff of the Jewish Board of Deputies, a figure much given these days to ducking into state parliament to gee up the anti-BDS brigade. He was tearing strips off Secord, let me tell you. And this, I swear, is what I heard him saying:

Walt, maaate, Israel's got a thing going with Azerbaijan, and you, co-chair of the NSW Parliamentary Friends of Israel for Zion'sake, you reckon you have a duty to see Iranian-backed Armenia! Are you off your rocker?!

I mean, our friends, the Azerbaijanis, are furious! Listen to this: "Officials from the Azerbaijani embassy in the Turkish capital, Ankara, complained to the Australian mission in the same city about the visit by the 'senator of the Australian state of NSW, Walt Secord'." (ibid)

Who the bloody hell do you think you are? Secord of Nagorno-Karabakh for Zion's sake? Walt, maaate, keep this up and the next thing you know you'll be deserting us for the NSW Parliamentary Friends of the Palestinians!