Priceless. Cartoon in today's Sun-Herald by Glen Le Lievre:
1. So I moved into this new neighbourhood.
A suitcase in each hand, the door of the house is kicked open: BAM!
2. Problem was, someone was already living there.
Bearded, sandal-wearing figure imploring, as in 'But this is my home.'
3. So I convinced him to move to a hole in the backyard. A win win, right?
Figure in hole peers out from under sheet of corrugated iron.
4. But I didn't trust him, so I made life in the backyard unbearable, hoping he'd up and leave - even though he had nowhere to go.
Steel-jawed traps ring figure in hole.
5. From time-to-time he decides to take the whole thing personally and starts throwing stuff at the house.
POK! SPAK! PIFF!
6. I have a right to defend myself.
Myriad artillery & tank barrels point menacingly at figure in hole.
7. So I shell the backyard.
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
8. God forgive him for making me make him make me make him make me make him cast the first stone.
Ground around hole black and smoking. Sheet of corrugated iron twisted out of shape. No sign of figure.